Saturday, 15 September 2012

47 reasons why I don't drink

I have to start by saying that anyone can do what they want and that I only try to stop people from specifically binge drinking - you can go get as merry as you like! Secondly, not all reasons cover all alcoholic beverages, some overlap and may offend you - there are some good reasons not to drink such as rape and religion that aren't relevant to me, but they are valid none the less

If any reasons need explaining them message me below - so, in the order I thought of them:

1) Cost, 2) Smell, 3) Taste, 4) Bad Breathe, 5) My Reputation, 
6) Being an example to the young, 7) Being Sick, 8) Becoming Ill, 9) Hangovers, 
10) Clubs are full of pretentious dicks, 11) People keep asking if I want a drink, 
12) Loss of self control and balance, 13) Emotionally draining, 14) Slows down my brain, 
15) Could be having real fun, 16) Could be learning something useful, 
17) The way alcohol is branded, 18) Increased risk of death, 19) Increased risk of injury, 
20) I don't need my inhibitions lowered, 21) I don't want to get in any habits, 
22) Increased risk of alcoholism later on in life, 23) Keeping valuables safe, 
24) Any medicinal defects, 25) 'Beer Belly' or getting fatter, 26) Effects on the liver, 
27) Fear of addiction, 28) Memory loss, 29) Effects on sleep, 30) Effects on intelligence, 
31) Slower reactions, 32) Slurred speech, 33) Dehydration, 34) Fainting/blackout, 
35) Hinders my growth while I'm young, 36) Regrets the next day, 37) Risk of drink driving,
38) Worse future employment prospects, 39) Risk of getting spiked, 40) It's a poison, 
41) Self respect, 42) Decrease in anxiety, 43) Loss of pride, 44) Decrease in honesty, 
45) Less trustworthy, 46) Losing my integrity, 47) decreased self worth

I'm sure there are more reasons I can't think of, but when you ask me 'why don't you drink?' you now know why - in full - the unedited uncensored version

Worst excuses for drinking:
1) 'Because everyone else does!' - These people shouldn't be populating the planet, seriously, stop breeding - and breathing
2) 'It's Social!' - so is a suicide pact! You can play card games, have campfires and fish without being a risk to yourself and others
3) 'It lowers your inhibitions!' - I can't deny this, but surely you're ignoring the underlying problem that you lack self confidence?? It means you're probably the sort of person to actually write 'I'm a confident person' on your CV - that means you're also an idiot

Considering a lot of people reading this are students, with no mortgage or short term debts, no 9-5 job and no children, you might have a car, a TV, a mobile phone, a computer, food to eat, a warm bed every night and friends and family around you to love you, you have little reason to relieve stress that doesn't exist - So why exactly, might I ask, do YOU drink?

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